Читать онлайн «The Sun and Her Flowers»
Автор Рупи Каур
also by rupi kaur
the sun and her flowers copyright © 2017 by Rupi Kaur. All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced in any manner whatsoever without written permission except in the case of reprints in the context of reviews.
Andrews McMeel Publishing
a division of Andrews McMeel Universal
1130 Walnut Street, Kansas City, Missouri 64106
ISBN: 978-1-4494-8890-1
Library of Congress Control Number: 2017948761
Illustrations and design by Rupi Kaur
ATTENTION: SCHOOLS AND BUSINESSES
to my makers
kamaljit kaur and suchet singh
i am.
because of you.i hope you look at us
and think
your sacrifices were worth it
to my stunning sisters and brother
prabhdeep kaur
kirandeep kaur
saaheb singh
we are in this together
you define love.
contents
wilting
falling
rooting
rising
blooming
bees came for honey
flowers giggled as they
undressed themselves
for the taking
the sun smiled
- the second birth
on the last day of love
my heart cracked inside my body
i spent the entire night
casting spells to bring you back
i reached for the last bouquet of flowers
you gave me
now wilting in their vase
one
by
one
i popped their heads off
and ate them
i stuffed a towel at the foot of every door
leave i told the air
i have no use for you
i drew every curtain in the house
go i told the light
no one is coming in
and no one is going out
- cemetery
you left
and i wanted you still
yet i deserved someone
who was willing to stay
i spend days in bed debilitated by loss
i attempt to cry you back
but the water is done
and still you have not returned
i pinch my belly till it bleeds
have lost count of the days
sun becomes moon and
moon becomes sun and
i become ghost
a dozen different thoughts
tear through me each second
you must be on your way
perhaps it’s best if you’re not
i am okay
no
i am angry
yes
i hate you
maybe
i can’t move on
i will
i forgive you
i want to rip my hair out
over and over and over again
till my mind exhausts itself into a silence
yesterday
the rain tried to imitate my hands
by running down your body
i ripped the sky apart for allowing it
- jealousy
in order to fall asleep
i have to imagine your body
crooked behind mine
spoon ladled into spoon
till i can hear your breath
i have to recite your name
till you answer and
we have a conversation
only then
can my mind
drift off to sleep
- pretend
it isn’t what we left behind
that breaks me
it’s what we could’ve built
had we stayed
i can still see our construction hats lying
exactly where we left them
pylons unsure of what to guard
bulldozers gazing out for our return
the planks of wood stiff in their boxes
yearning to be nailed up
but neither of us goes back
to tell them it is over
in time
the bricks will grow tired of waiting and crumble
the cranes will droop their necks in sorrow
