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Meg Cabot

Queen of Babble Gets Hitched

In ancient times, weddings were a little more casual than they are today. Rival tribes, in order to increase their population, would frequently stage raids against one another, with the sole purpose of acquiring brides. That’s right—they’d steal one another’s ladyfolk. The raiding party was kind of what you’d consider your modern-day groom and his groomsmen.

Only, you know, they wouldn’t be wearing tuxes. More like loincloths.

Sometimes the young ladies in question got wind of the raiding party beforehand and didn’t necessarily put up much of a fight.

But this didn’t mean there wasn’t ill feeling on the part of their families and friends.

Tip to Avoid a Wedding Day Disaster

Always have more gifts on your registry than you do wedding guests. This way you can avoid receiving the same gift twice… and those guests who can’t actually make it to the festivities will still be able to find something lovely to get for you!

LIZZIE NICHOLS DESIGNS^™

• Chapter 1 •

“Chaz,” I say, poking the man in the tuxedo who lay sprawled across my bed. “You have to get out of here. ”

Chaz brushes my hand away as if it’s annoying him. “Mom,” he says. “Stop it. I told you, I already took out the trash. ”

“Chaz. ” I poke him some more. “I mean it. Wake up. You have to go. ”

Chaz wakes up with a start. “Wha—Where am I?” He looks blearily around the room until his unfocused gaze finally comes to rest on me. “Oh. Lizzie. What time is it?”

“Time for you to go,” I say, grabbing hold of his arm and pulling on it. “Come on.

But I might as well be pulling on an elephant. He won’t budge.

“What’s going on?” Chaz wants to know. I have to admit, it’s not easy, being so mean to him. He looks downright adorable in his tuxedo shirt, all stubbly faced and confused, with his dark hair sticking up in tufts all over his head. He squints at me. “Is it morning already? Hey—why do you still have your clothes on?”

“Because nothing happened between us,” I say, relieved that it’s true. I mean, stuff happened. But my Spanx are still on, so not that much stuff. Thank God. “Come on, get up. You have to go. ”

“What do you mean, nothing happened between us?” Chaz looks offended. “How can you say that? That’s my beard burn you’re wearing. ”

I lift a hand guiltily to my face. “What? Oh my God. You’re kidding, right?”

“No, I’m not kidding. You’re completely chafed. ” A look of self-satisfaction spreads across his face as he stretches his arms. “Now come over here and let’s continue where we left off before you so rudely fell asleep, which I’m going to try not to hold against you, although I will admit it’s going to be difficult, and will probably necessitate punishment in the form of a spanking if I can figure out how to get those things off you. What did you call them again? Oh, yeah. Spanx. ” Chaz brightens. “Hey, how appropriate. ”